The Bible Burrito Podcast

Not Your Normal Bible Study Podcast

Blog

Of Green Beans and Cilantro

by Leave a Comment

I do not like green beans. When I was a kid at Thanksgiving time, my mom would make me eat green beans with the rest of my meal. I learned a very simple trick to mask the taste of green beans- I mix them into my mashed potatoes. To this day, I will mix almost any food with mashed potatoes because I love them so much (Have you ever tried to eat mashed potatoes between two pieces of bread? Delicious mashed potato sandwich!

On the other hand, my father in law HATES cilantro. Just one leaf of cilantro in an otherwise normal dish makes the whole meal inedible to him. He cannot handle even the smallest amount of cilantro. Which was unfortunate, at one point, because I went through a phase in my cooking where I just loved using cilantro!

God hates sin. But he does not hate sin in the same way that I hate green beans. He hates it in the same way that my father in law hates cilantro. The problem is that we treat God as if he will accept our sin mixed in with the “mashed potatoes” of us living pure. God cannot overlook sin. He cannot simply say, “I see that bad stuff you did, but the good stuff you did makes up for it.” No, sin is an affront to the character of God, it goes against everything he is and everything he does. Even our righteousnesses, to him, are as filthy rags.

That is why the love of God is so AMAZING! You see, God hates sin but he loves you. The death of Christ on the cross is evidence that God loves you equally or more than he hates sin. We will never be able to fully grasp the deep hatred that God has for sin. On the same token, we will also never be able to fully grasp the love that he has for us. It is no wonder that Paul refers to the gift of salvation as “unspeakable” in 2nd Corinthians 9:15. Remember today just how much God loves you!

Listen to this episode from Nahum about how God feels about sin!

Dave and the Raspberry Sword — The Adventure Begins

by 2 Comments

Dave lived in the land of Arcadia with his mother-in-law and his goat named Sal. He was a pretty pathetic man. When all of the other men in Arcadia enjoyed pastimes like jousting, slaying dragons, and playing rugby, Dave was more than content to tend to his berry garden; which was unfortunate, because Dave did not like the taste of berries, Sal had diverticulitis, and Dave’s mother-in-law didn’t like anything that Dave did. Despite his lack of desire to eat his own berries, his berry garden thrived and was the pride of all of Arcadia, which goes to show that Arcadia did not have much going for it.
Arcadia had once been a prosperous and happy land, until it was invaded by the orcs. Orcs were short, green creatures with pointy ears, buck teeth, and claws. The orcs were not the brightest of creatures, in fact, they were actually pretty stupid. It is a well-known fact that the orcs do not know how to tie their shoes, so they run around barefooted because they also do not have enough toes to make flip-flops work properly.
You may be wondering how such a stupid race of creatures was able overthrow a prosperous land like Arcadia. It is best not to ask these questions because no one really knows the answer. One day they were not here and then suddenly the next day they were. Everybody just assumes that Derek accidentally kept the back door open; everybody hates Derek.
Today was just like any other day. The suns were up, a cool autumn breeze swept through the air, and Dave was going to tend to his berry garden. He ate his daily bowl of bran cereal and walked out the door.
“You’re worthless, Dave!” His mother-in-law said as he walked outside. She would say this practically everyday.
“Love you too, ma!” He shouted back as he left his hut.
“I’m not your mother!” He could hear her yell back as he continued to walk to the garden.
Dave was proud of his berry garden because he had every berry imaginable: blueberries, lemonberries, snozberries, boysenberries, and elderberries. Of course, he did not have strawberries because those do not exist in Arcadia or any of the realms. But the one patch of berries that he was the most proud of was his raspberries. Dave’s raspberries were the plumpest in all the realms. One time, Dave even made the cover of Berry Magazine because of his raspberries, which, yes, is a real thing. As Dave pulled weeds and tended to his berries, suddenly a bright light shined down on him from the sky. Bewildered, Dave looked up to see where the light came from. Descending from the sky came a woman who was plump and blue, wearing a crown and holding a scepter.
“I am the Queen of all Berries,” said the strange woman, “And I am here to bestow on you the greatest honor to be bestowed in all berry-dom.”
Dave looked around to see who the queen was talking to. Upon realizing that she was talking to him, he said, “You are talking to me? You do know that I am a pretty pathetic person, right?”
The Queen of all Berries nodded, “Yes, you are an awfully pathetic man, but you are well versed in the berry arts and have caught the attention of the Counsel of Berries. It has been determined that you are the only one who is worthy of wielding the Raspberry Sword and restoring order to the Land of Arcadia.”
“This is all a little much. I have a few questions. Like, there is a Counsel of Berries? How do you choose who is in a counsel like that—”
“I don’t have time to answer your questions because I have a meeting with the Queen of Turnips in half an hour. Here’s the sword.”
The sword plopped down in front of him; it glowed with a mystical force, with the hilt giving off a deep purple color.
“This is a special sword, Dave. The Raspberry Sword actually tastes like raspberries. With it, you will change the world,” said the Queen of all Berries.
“For what possible reason would a sword taste like a berry?!?” Dave asked, “Is this one of those ‘you’re on candid camera’ things?”
“You are the chosen one, restore order to Arcadia and be the hero you are destined to be,” and with that, the Queen of the Berries disappeared as suddenly as she came.
“That did not answer any of my questions,” Dave said to himself. Dave picked up the sword and looked at it. He had never been on an adventure before, maybe now was his chance to make a difference in the world.
Dave looked down at Sal, “Are you ready for an adventure?”

Two Dangerous Words

by Leave a Comment

20120813-154124.jpg

Two of the most dangerous words in a believer’s vocabulary are words that don’t seem so dangerous: status quo.

A dictionary definition of status quo would be “the existing state of affairs.” Now that doesn’t seem so harmful. What on earth is so dangerous about the way things are?

“Status quo” for a Christian becomes very perilous because he starts to get used to the way things are. He is, you could say, stuck in a rut. And this rut entails things that the Bible never intended for the Christian life, or for the church. Things like prayerlessness, a lack of time in God’s Word, carelessness over the lost condition of those around you, going to church out of routine or obligation, and an overall lack of Holy Spirit power abound in your life and church if you’re satisfied with the status quo.

God offers a much different option.

“Sow to yourselves in righteousness, reap in mercy; break up your fallow ground: for it is time to seek the LORD…“ Hosea 10:12

Fallow ground is ground that was once fertile and useful, but it has been abandoned. God says to the believer, “Remember where you began neglecting your walk with me, and go back there!” Turn over that hardened soil, pluck up the weeds, work the ground until it is useable once more. Don’t just read your Bible, beg God to speak to you. Don’t just utter vain repetitions you pass off as prayer, truly fall at the throne of grace and seek God’s face. Get back in touch with the God of your salvation.

Trying to do right things the wrong way is just as frustrating as doing the wrong things. God wants us to get back to an abiding relationship, where we find all our strength, energy, joy, peace, contentment, and will to go on in the person of Christ Jesus. Stop living the Christian life in the flesh, and yield to the Savior, Who craves to live it through you!

Break up your fallow ground, O wandering and weak saint, for it truly is time to seek the LORD.

I Surrender… Some

by Leave a Comment

Imagine if you will the words to a familiar hymn, with a slight twist…

Most to Jesus I surrender; most to him I freely give; I will ever love and trust him, in his presence often live.

Much to Jesus I surrender; humbly at his feet I bow, worldly pleasures mostly forsaken; take me, Jesus, after I clean up my life.

A lot to Jesus I surrender; make me, Savior, somewhat thine; fill me half-way with thy love and power; sort of know that thou art mine.

Some to Jesus I surrender; Lord, I give what is comfotable to thee; give me thy love and power; let thy blessing fall on me.

A little to Jesus I surrender; later I’ll feel the sacred flame. O the joy of fulfilling self! Glory, glory, to my name!

It doesn’t sound quite right, does it? Sadly this is the heart-cry of many a so-called follower of Christ in our churches today. Is it any wonder that we don’t see God work like He once did? Ought we be surprised at the worsening spiritual climate in our great nation? The key duty of God’s people has been neglected. Romans 12:1 says, “I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service.”

The world says, “Look out for number one!” God says, “Crucify self!” God expects (and reasonably so) for every one of His children to “deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow [Christ].” (Luke 9:23) The Bible also plainly declares, “No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other.” (Matthew 6:24) You are either serving God or serving self. You cannot possibly hope to live for yourself most of your week, and expect God to be pleased with the two cents you throw His way on Sunday and Wednesday. Your entire life belongs to God. He bought it! He has every right to it! (1 Corinthians 6:19, 20)

The only options are yielding fully to God, or fully rebelling. Partial surrender doesn’t earn you any brownie points with God.

On the bright side, God has wonderful blessings in store for the believer who will simply surrender to Him in humble obedience:

“But as it is written, Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him. But God hath revealed them unto us by his Spirit: for the Spirit searcheth all things, yea, the deep things of God.” – 1 Corinthians 2:9 & 10

Craving

by Leave a Comment

You’ve all experienced it before (especially you ladies who have ever been pregnant): You’re at home, work, school, the sofa (or wherever), and all of sudden, like a mental-emotional ninja, you get a….. craving! The day was going quite calmly until you suddenly had an overwhelming desire for some random food (or non-food item that you suddenly want to try to eat… *ahem* pregnant people). Suddenly you are no longer focused on work, the TV show, the road on which you’re driving, and you have one singular goal: satisfy that craving. You may have, like I have, gone to great lengths, driven long distances, and spent exorbetent amounts of cash just to satisfy that desire for a large Reese’s McFlurry – by the way, is it just me, or is always when you desperately need ice cream that every McDonald’s within 15 miles has a broken ice cream machine?
We do some pretty ridiculous things to satisfy a craving for a food or beverage, but when was the last time you can say you craved God? David said in Psalm 63:
O God, thou art my God; early will I seek thee: my soul thirsteth for thee, my flesh longeth for thee in a dry and thirsty land, where no water is; To see thy power and thy glory, so as I have seen thee in the sanctuary.
That’s a pretty intense craving. David relates his desire for God and God’s power to the desire that you would have for food and water if you were stranded in the desert. In fact, David wrote this Psalm in the wilderness of Judah, hiding from King Saul, who was trying to kill him. As David found surveyed the dry and thirsty land that he was in physically, he realized that the world, which has no care for God, is a dry and thirsty land spiritually. He understood in those times of drought and need that his greatest need was not food and water, but the Lord. He recalled the times when he had seen God do great things, and he craved that power in his circumstances.
When the going gets tough, most of us unfortunately start craving physical solutions to our problems and run farther from God. In those times of physical need, you need God more than ever. I believe we can learn some important lessons from David’s Psalm to God that will help us to see God’s power in our lives.
  1. Don’t be ashamed to publicly identify with God. Like David we must declare, “O God, thou are my God!” and decide that we’d rather have His favor than man’s popularity. Making yourself known as a Christian will bring discomfort, but that’s why God sent the Holy Spirit to be our Comforter!
  2. Seek God early: early in priority, and early in the day. This is really the key of the whole thing. David declared, “Early will I seek thee.” Seeking God cannot be a part-time or passing-thought kind of task. You must discipline yourself to keep God’s Word in your heart all day long, and to communicate with Him constantly. No relationship can work where one party refuses to listen or to talk.
  3. Realize that this world is a spiritual desert. You live in a world that really has nothing to do with the things of God. Everyone is looking out for “number one” in the world. You will find no spiritual nutrition in Kelly Clarkson, Dr. Phil or O’Reilly. Without a healthy relationship with God, you’ll go through life spiritually anorexic at best.
  4. Desire to see God work in your life like He has worked in others’. When you see people getting right with God and excited about the things of God, determine that you want that for yourself. Revival starts in your heart.

Once you finally have a craving for God, you’ll find that God delights in satisfying that craving. “Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled.” – Matthew 5:6

It’s time to get hungry for the things of God.

How to Shop at Walmart

by Leave a Comment

The following are several unwritten rules that I have observed as an employee at Walmart. These rules explain how many people think they are supposed to shop at Walmart.

  1. Assume that anyone wearing blue is an employee.
  2. Assume that every employee knows (or should know) everything about every minute detail about all of Walmart.
  3. Play football throughout the entire store.
  4. Carry a gallon of milk to the opposite end of the store, then leave it sitting on an unrefrigerated shelf.
  5. Never look at the signs that tell you what kind of items are down an isle.
  6. Assume that if Walmart does not carry it, it must not exist in the universe.
  7. Open every box you touch, then decide not to buy whatever is inside after all.
  8. Blame the hourly associates for things that only the store manager can control.
  9. Get an associate’s attention by yelling, “Hey you!” rather than by calmly saying, “Excuse me.”
  10. Stick your used gum on the shelf.
  11. Let your toddler drool all over a toy, then put it back on the shelf.
  12. Respond to your irate and out of control child with, “Don’t make me count to three…”
  13. Repeat #12 five minutes later.
  14. Repeat #12 ten minutes later.
  15. Repeat #12-14 for the next half hour.
  16. Give up on controlling your child and pretend he is not screaming.
  17. Walk past several safety cones and an associate who is warning you of a wet floor, then threaten to sue Walmart when you slip.
  18. Use the store ladders that are labeled “for associate use only.”
  19. Ask obvious questions like, “Where are your registers?”
  20. Attempt to start a riot about the fact that there are only three registers open.
  21. Force an associate to help you shop for two hours.
  22. When an associate says that he is 100% sure that a particular is not in the back room, ask, “Well can you check?”
  23. Go through the express checkout lane with 100 items.
  24. Stand in front of the guy pulling 3000 pounds of freight behind him.
  25. Refuse to walk your shopping cart twelve more feet to the cart corral.